Thursday, October 30, 2008

The Police Station!

Well after my contra ton with the minibus, and being patched up by the kind folk who were travelling in the minibus (who's first aid kit was far more accessible then mine! Mental note - make first aid kit more accessible as having to remove everything from the pannier to get to it might not be possible if there is a next time!!!), needless to say the police were called and my bike and I were loaded into a police pick up for am hour and a half long journey that resulted in some brick and tin shack that they considered a police station! Anyway, I began to be less alarmed at this point as I thought even if I was banged up in this sorry excuse for a building, I would be able to sneeze my way out of it after dark and make for the hills!!! Then I realised we were in the hills and they had guns so I changed my attitude and went for the apologetic approach!
Fortunately for me, I had for once obeyed driving regulations and actually bought myself some Laos insurance in Vientiene so I was going to avoid jail! Then next issue, was how were we going to carry out an interview when I didnt speak Laos and they didnt speak English! Well they was no worries there...they decided to go and fetch the part time doctor who was now studying again in BKK but was back on his holidays! So in rocked this doctor who smelt like he worked ina brewery and couldnt stop putting his arm around me and occasionally touching my knee!!! Luckily the representative for the other side also spoke english pretty well so between to two of them they told me that my insuranc ewould pay for the other vehicle but I was to sort myself out! The next issue was how much the police were going to fine me and charge me for their time! I didnt want to point out that surely they already received a wage for their duties as they were armed and out numbered me and at present I still hadnt felt the cold hard feeling of steel around my wrists and wanted to keep it that way! Anyway, they decided on a total fine of 255,000Kip - about 18 pounds. So when I went for my wallet a bit too quickly, they then put another piece of paper infront of me with another bill of 275,000Kip! I then realised the game had to be played and in true Laos style I was actually allowed to present to the officers an arguement against the fine and make an offer! Anyway, it was a feeble arguement at which the end I said I could pay 400,000kip and they agreed! I still think I was had but I was pleased to be out of the clink for the total sum of about 40 pounds!
Anyway, as I thought I was in the clear, my drunk touchy feely translator decided to offer me a place to stay for the night with him!!! Not wanting to accept but believe me, this town consisted of a few mud huts and a few more proper buildings, I realised my chances of a guest house with ensuite and double bed were fairly slim. I therefore accepted. Anyway, he rode away from the police station after telling everyone he was drunk and nobody seemed to bat an eyelid! He came back for me an hour later once I had collected my stuff and been beckoned over the road to have a beer with the locals sat outside a shop! Once we got back to his I was a little relieved to be introduce to his wife and 18 month old son and was pointed to a room that I was to sleep in. Anyway, he doctor skills came out to play as he force fed me pill after pill and squirted droplets and cream (dont be sick!) over my wounds. got knows what I have taken but one of them was amoxycilin so i know that was good. Anyway, Im bored with typing now so I am fairly sure you are bored with reading! The rest will be brief...
had v. traditional Laos Dinner, then went back to bed. about 30 minutes later his son in law (13) came in to the room and proceeded to bed down too! this is when I realised that the place to stay he had offered was in fact half of his sons bed rather than the spare room I had envisaged! Anyway, I was shattered so cared very little and promptly slept! Woke up , he cooked, I left...there pretty well abbreviated!
I am now back in Luang Prabang hoping that there may be somewhere that can fabricate the bits of my bike that need replacing! I will keep you all informed as to how she fairs up as Im sure you're dying to know!

Been a while, Im in Laos now!

Right, well its been about two weeks since the last update and my...what a lot has happened!!!
To be honest I cant remember two weeks ago so that will save everyone from a lot of reading!
Well I crossed the border into Laos from Thailand with the bike and funnily enough, none of the officials had no idea what they were doing when it came to allowing the bike across. This basically resulted in a couple of hours of me being sent to room 5, then room 8, then as they were out back to room 6, they didnt want to speak to me so back to room 5 again, then sent downstairs but on the way downstairs met another official who sent me back to room 5 AGAIN!!! This time I decided to press on the nice lady that perhaps it may be her job as everyone seems to be pointing me to her!

After a phone call and me showing her all my papers, she took me outside and told me that my carnet did not cover Laos so that was that! I then pressed upon her that Laos was not meant to use the Carnet I only showed it to her for her information. She then took me downstairs to some head od dept who decided he would use the carnet (by the way, this is a passport for the bike that needs to be stamped when the bike enters the country and then stamped again when the bike leaves the country. This way it saves me from paying and having to recover all import duties). He then proceeded to stamp the section saying I had exported the bike from Laos! Not the most useful of official stamps but after tearing a page out and starting again, we eventually got it sorted! Anyway I got my own back on them by confusing the whole situation when I managed to check out of the country instead of checking in! This basically meant my 30second old visa now had USED stamped across it and I had a departure stamp in my passport! To help matters, the bike was now in eventhough I was now out!!! Who wants a simple life anyway!
The result of this was alot of people shaking their head at me and getting out the 'official' tipex and tipexing out the USED stamp and writing something in Laos next to it! They then stamped cancelled over the departure stamp! I have no idea what will happen when I try to leave this country but they assure me I will be fine! Like they know anything!
Anyway, Im in and enjoying it. Well, up until yesterday but I'll get to that later! I spent a night in Vientiene (which is home to probably the most depressing guest house accommodation in Laos!) and fortunately met a bunch of people in the evening looking for guest houses and then again in the morning. Following this I got an invite to have breakfast with a bunch of them who had travelled on some 20 hours bus journey.
Anyway, had breakfast, exchanged emails and organised to meet up in Vang Viang so off I headed on an amazingly scenic ride for about 5 hours.
Anyway Vang Viang is Laos's version of Tnerefie's Playa de las Americas! But not quite a crazy as everything closes at 12. but basically there are an awful lot of tourists there.
The next day about 8 of us went tubing (floating down the river in a tractor tyre's inner tube and stopping at riverside bars along the way. I cannot explain this experience and do it justice so I wont bother. Lets just say I had a great day and wasnt going to leave VV without doign it again! Which I didnt. In fact 3 days later I was floating down the same river, again running so late the company refused to give us all our deposit back because we arrived an hour after dark. Although a stupid thing to do...floating down a river in the middle of Laos on an inner tube in the dark is surprisingly good fun! Anyway, between these tubing escapades I went full on rock climbing and exploring caves but thats dull in comparison so I wont bore you with that!
Then we all headed to Luang Prabang (another 5 hours on even more scenic roads!). When here we only really had a day together so went to a beautiful waterfall that you can swim in and a bear sanctuary!
So, this morning was time for the group to dispand and we all headed our separate ways. All I can say is that I hope everyone elses was not as bad as mine. After heading North for about two hours and having a lovely ride, the back end started feeling a little slippy eventhough the roads were bone dry. Anyway I had hardly had time to think about whether to do anything about it when on a righ hander it slowly but surely drifted away from me and I gracefully slid down the road on my arse! Anyway, I picked my self up and carried on. Only to be thinking about why it happened and not concentrating on the job in hand...which was missing the minibus full of french tourists thaat had come around the corner in the middle of the road! Dont think Im passing the buck here, I too was in the middle of the road as thats how its done here! However, its every other drivers automatic reaction to swerve to the RHS as thats the side they drive on. The problem arose when I swerved to my LHS following my English reactions! Anyway, my thoughts of 'oh shit, this guy is drunk!' turned into, 'oh no, Im on the wrong side of the road!' but unfortunately just a little late! Luckily I decided to take on the verge rather than try to right myself as otherwise I would have gone through his windscreen for sure. The result of this choice was being struck on the RHS of my bike just forward of my leg I think. I then got bounced off the minibus and ended up lying on the LHS a few metres from the minibus! Anyway, the photos show the damage to the vehicles and the damage to my self is relatively minor. I was struggling to walk a few hours after the accident but I think thats just some tissue/ligament damage to my left knee and other than a sore right knee, both elbows, neck and slight headache I am just tickety boo!!!

Saturday, October 18, 2008

A-ra-ka-die No more!

Well up until now ive tried being adventurous and learnt the word Arakadie which translates as 'whatever'!This i thought would allow me to experience a bit more of indigenous thai food!However, yesterday it backfired yet again to a degree I struggled to keep down!

I had luckily pulled into a Police station to ask directions as nick (and thus his satnav!) have deserted me to go and get some in Germany! Im glad i did as I had just missedthe turning i wantedby 2kms. anyway on this juntion in a very small town, was a little cafe-bistro well noted in all good cuisine books! Well actually,it was a tin roofed shack with a couple of tables and stove! Anyway, with a big smile i asked for arakadie! And with an even bigger smile she dished up some noodle soup with something that I think wasmashedup mork and gristle balls, some chunks of intestine and something else which was dark brown and served in chunks about an inch square and about 3mm thick!anyway, these didnt have the texture of liver or kidney or anything else ive eaten and the after taste almost made me yak! anyway, the noodles and stock was lovely!

Ihave also forced fruit down my throat so as not to offend (oh and tomatoes!) for those that know, fruit and tomatoes have not passed theselips for a goodnumber of years but when i pulled up at a guest house in a small town that clearly had not seen a white face for a while and this guest house had clearly not done that much business recently, the house keeper showed me upstairs to my room (which over looked the mekong river so not all bad!!!) gave me a fresh towel and then sent her daughter to get me a whole plate full of lovely fresh fruit! anyway, so as not to upset them and also because i had no way of tellig them i didnt eat fruit, i tucked into a good half dozen slices of pinapple and something else that was pinky orange and had the texture of a soft apple! i drew the line after one slice of the white fruit with black seeds. i also drew the line when they brought me another bloody plate full in the morning!!!

Anyway, enough of that. i am now on my jack jones and at the Laos border. Have stopped in a guest house with the most english speakers in than i have seen for a while so may go crazy and iondulge ina beer tonight- my first for 6 days!!! Will be tackling customs and immigration tomorrow morning so I have all day to sort out paperwork for the bike as i have been warned that it takes time!

I will then be tackling the Laos roads which Nick (although having left has obviously not forgotten me!!!) has just forwarded me a link to a website warning about the condition of the Laos roads, especiallyin fact the ones that i have planned formy itinerary - super!!!

ran over a chicken, well more a chicken flew into my bike! I felt it on my side but took most of the brunt on the hand guard! Decided not to stop as dont know what the penalty is for running over someones chicken! I would probably be indebted to them for a lifetimes salaries orsomething crazy!i have heard stories about a Thai guy being run over by another drunk thai guy but only got injured so the driver then reversed over him again until he was dead because if he was unable to work he woudl have to pay the guy his salary for the rest of his life whereas if he was dead it is only a one off payment of 25 000 bart! thats about 450 pounds!!!

Anyway on that cheery note i will love and leave you and be in touch again when i am in laos!

Sunday, October 12, 2008

Its all about the bikes baby!

Well, Its been a while but it feels even longer!

We've been non stop since last thu but my arse has been permanently glued to the seat of either my bike or a hired dirt bike...its been awesome!

We got to Chiang Mai early last week I think but to be honest I still havent caught up on what day/week/month it is! anyway, we met this girl Luna who we were meant to be staying with through Nick and 'couchsurfing'! as we met her we also met another five people who were also staying with her! Then when we got back to hers we met another three people who were ALSO staying with her!

I know what you're thinking. probably the same as us....wicked she must have anawesome place, HUGE!!! Well it turns out her and her flat mate share a two bedroom flat! Yep, the 10 of us couch surfers were sharing the floor of the living room and another bedroom! oh, and the flooring in Thailand is predominently ceramic tiles!!! So with a silk sleeping bag liner as bedding,, I could forsee a fairly uncomfortable night ahead! Anyway, 12 of us went out for dinner and a couple of drinks and on our return, Nick decided to jump in bed with the host (after thougtfully asking her permission!) and I lucked out by getting the only sofa in the flat! I was going to be gentlemanly and offer it to one of the ladies but my good sense kicked in just in time and I bedded down to a good nights kip while everyone else spent 8 sleepless hours on the hard cold floor! Thanks goodness I havent been that well brought up!!!

Anyway, the nest day (even though we were due to spend a few days in CM) Nick and I decided to check into a guest house to benefit from the luxuries of a proper bed!

as for the biking- we tend to be in the saddle most days doing between 100-250miles and then just get a guest house wherever we end up then up in the morning to ride again. In fact we have only had one day off since we left BKK and that was because of the rain! The roads are amazing, if not asking for a major accident! They are unbelievably twisty and steep and sometimes amazingly smooth tarmac (even better than a race track) and then suddenly you go round a corner and there is either a herd of blooming (sensored for the benefit of the parents!) cows in the way (quite often actually lying in the road) or the tarmac stops and a dirt road begins!!!
Anyway, two highlights so far have actually been in the last few days...arrived inChiang Mai and got to know an American who has lived here for 5 years. He runs a Harley Davidson shop. Anyway Nick had to have some work done on his bike so went there. Nick and I then went for a two day trip around Chiang Mai coz Richie (American) wanted to take us dirt biking on sunday which sounded awesome. Anyway our two day trip was spend continually riding at race pace around these roads for hours after hour. even on my XT I felt the road scrap my right boot I had the bike lent over so much round a right hander!!! Anyway, we got back and decided we were lucky to be alive and shouldnt be so irresponsible again coz its asking for an accident. unfortunately we then hired the dirt bikes and went off into the jungle for a bit of practice so we werent complete novices on the sunday with richie. We got completely lost and ended up tackling stuff that you see on tv! I ditched the bike big-ish twice! broke clutch lever on one of them! we had no idea where we were and the track (and I do mean a track! you would have had difficulty walking along it and most of the time there was a bloody big drop on one side!) just kept getting harder but was too narrow to turn around and we had come down stuff that we just wouldnt be able to ride up!
Anyway, we survived.after about another hour we found a concrete road and followed it until we found civilisation! Then after promisiing never to be so irresponsible again we went out with this guy Richie who took us at speeds we didnt even dream off the day before. then we met with these Thai guys (two of which were motocross racers) and joined in with them which took us at speeds which Richhie didnt even dream of!!! You can imagine what it was like for us! Anyway, there must have been some divine intervention that day for me coz I didnt drop the bike once and we lived to tell the tale!
I promise never to be so irresponsible again! Until next time!

I am now quite sure how we are both still in one piece and I am thankful to whatever powers look over us! Im begining to believe there might actually be something in all this religious mumbo jumbo after all!!! Well actually, Im not really I just reckon we got lucky!

We are now having our second day off and I am most grateful for it!

Hope everyone is doing well at home!